Most Infernals are currently held in the Orwell Internment Camps near Ipswich, Suffolk, pending their repatriation to Hell as soon as order has been restored there.
A MESSAGE FROM THE SUPREME KNIGHT THE LORD PROTECTOR DROGEDA
BE WORTHY! BE MANLY! BELLIGERENT!Our Warpships have sailed to the edge of the Galaxy for the sake of Divine Glory to bring the ignorant Aliens out of their Satanic darkness.
We Humans are the Force for Good in the Galaxy. We want to reach out and be a friend and partner to all Alien races helping them to inhabit sovereign, prosperous and stable planets. That is our Destiny.
Get respect! Get status! Take this opportunity to serve in the Great Work!
Give your life meaning with your own personal Coat of Arms. Be awarded the insignia of Knight of the Illustrious Royal Order of the Sacred Warp.
Here are some of the great tasks YOU will be carrying out as a Knight of the Warped Rose:
- Fulfill your destiny by destroying Alien Temples dedicated to the Cosmic Goddess.
- Burn Heretic Priestesses of the Cosmic Goddess with your lasers. The Goddess creates, but we cremate. REMEMBER: It is not killing. It is cleansing.
- Help our Peacekeeping forces to exact Tribute from Alien planets in return for our protection. REMEMBER: It is better to be feared than loved.
- Lead the Aliens to Salvation. Reclaim them from savagery to gentleness and humanity. Encourage them with the laser lash. Tell them every day, ‘Happy are those who are weeping because the Kingdom of God is for them.’
- Oversee Aliens sent down Spice Mines to bring back valuable resources to Earth. Your knowledge of the gospel will allow you to find texts encouraging the Aliens to love poverty, like ‘Happier are the poor because they will inherit the heaven,’ and, ‘It’s very difficult for the rich to enter the kingdom of God.’
- Qualify for the MacIavelli Award by taking compromising holo-vids of your fellow Knights so they will do your bidding in the future.
- Execute Knights who have betrayed their enlistment oath and revealed our Secret Rituals.
- Play your part in the Crusade to rid the Galaxy of the Mad Cow Disease of the Goddess and bring the Light of the Lord to the New Worlds.
- Earn forgiveness for your sins while acquiring vast riches from the Galaxy. Every Crusader gets a percentage of the takings. REMEMBER: Might is right.
- Above all – your task will be to destroy the Quantum Mechanic who calls himself SLAYER or SCHLOCK. This Satanic Robot is the greatest threat we face today!